Ugly

For the past two weeks, no matter where I go I can't escape girls wearing this outfit. Penn State, Detroit, Pittsburgh... it doesn't matter. Everywhere I go, I run into girls, who otherwise would be hot, wearing this ugly ass outfit.


What the fuck is up with it and where did it come from? Sex & The City isn't on anymore so girls are no longer stealing every fashion and social idea from it so it must have been in a magazine. Most likely it was one page after a list of 101 things to turn your man on, which by the way are: 1. Feed him 2. Fuck him 3. Shut up the fuck up 4. Repeat.

But seriously, who thinks this outfit looks good? It looks fucking retarded. It looks like a mix between bad 80s fashion and Olivia Newton-John's bad girl outfit in Grease. Girls, ditch the ugly belt and switch out the red heels for black ones. You'll look much better. Or just go naked. That works too.

All girls should take fashion advice from me. I'm awesome.

Tags: Fashion

Casino Royale....my ramblings

Those of you who know me pretty well know I am an absolute James Bond freak. Aside from owning all the movies on VHS, I also own three editions of the James Bond Encyclopedia, two Cd-Roms of trivia, and have actually won a James Bond trivia contest in Atlantic City winning $500 in house chips as a result. The newest 007 movie, Casino Royale, opened last weekend and I went to see it on Friday night. Below is my opinion of the movie which will contain some spoilers, but I won't give anything major away.

How does every Bond movie open? With a circle signifying a sniper rifle scope marching across the screen and with Bond in the sights. Once the scope reaches the middle, Bond turns, shoots, and kills the would be assassin and blood drips down the screen and the circle falls into a random corner and then the movie emerges. The first 5 or 10 minutes of every Bond movie is known as the teaser, a high paced action sequence which usually was independent of the plot of the movie. However in "The Spy Who Loved Me" the teaser was intrical to the plot and all the Pierce Brosnan films had teasers that were involved in the movie, but this formula remained intact. After the teaser, the movie's credits would roll and include some nice imagery and whatever theme song they decided to use. This is formulaic, but it is something that everyone expects from a Bond movie. I bring this up because in Casino Royale, this DOESN'T HAPPEN!! There is no Bond walking across the screen shooting at us, no blood dripping, and no action packed teaser. It starts off slow. The credit sequence though is one the best ones they have done recently. It has a decent enough song also. No credit sequence and song have been this good since "The World is not Enough." And before that, you'd have to go to early in Roger Moore's career to find one this good.....maybe "The Spy who Loved Me" or "Octopussy." The first sustained action sequence in the movie is absolutely unbelievable. You have a guy being chased by Bond, and this guy must be Spiderman, because he can scale any building or object that is put in front of him. I know, that watching a Bond movie requires a certain suspension of disbelief, but that was limited to gadgets which I can find believable (except for the invisible car in "Die Another Day"), but watching human beings climb untold heights with only their hands and feet on smooth surfaces and falling from tremedous heights without even a bruise? Not for me. Basically the action in this movie is good, but long. Every action sequence could have been shortened by 5 minutes. The whole card game plot is believable and very tense, but this seems to take a back seat to showcasing this new Bond, who is NOT very good. I had a problem with this movie since I heard it was to be a prequel. I saw absolutely no point to going back and re-inventing somethign holy and cherished (see Lucas, George). Although I did like the re-invention of Batman with "Batman Begins" which was PHENOMENAL! That in my mind was ok, because the last Batman movies were HORRENDOUS and a restart was all they could do to save it. The Bond franchise is still going strong, despite "Die Another Day's" attempt to destroy it.
The ending of "Casino Royale" just drags and drags. They throw in a "surprise" ending to try to fool us and keep us interested when I just wanted it to end so I could go home. Another thign that bothered the shit out of me was that the famous James Bond theme music was played only once in the movie....ONCE!!! No vodka martinis and he only says, "Bond....James Bond" only once and it is anti-climactic. The bottom line for me is that "Casino Royale" might be a good action movie and some people might like that, but I think it fails as a James Bond movie because it doesn't feel like a James Bond movie. When I see a Bond movie, I want to know it.


Tags: CASINO ROYALE

Wheels

With my recent job offer from Sikorsky coming in, I decided it was time to return the Jimmy and buy a car. Let me tell you, it's hard to find a Saab in central Pennsylvania let alone a Saab with a manual transmission here. Luckily the dealer in town just picked this one up at auction and called me about it.





It's a 2003 Saab 9-3 Arc in Cosmic Blue with pretty much every option. The best part is that even though it's a 2003, it only has 24,000 miles on it. I love the color so much. It stands out from everything else in a parking lot.

The car drives like a dream. A 210 horsepower turbo 2.0L engine with a six speed manual transmission... mmm. I already have gotten it up to 120 mph on a back country road. Its so fast. I'm going to get so many speeding tickets.


Tags: Saab

An Exclusive Glimpse Inside the Minds of The Two Headed Monster that Coaches Penn State's Offense:

Play: opponents 48, 3rd and 7

Galen: Hmm 3rd and 7, 3rd and 7... what to do, what to do?
Jay: Well we could try.... nah you said 7 right GH?
Galen: Why yes I do believe it's third and seven, thats a seven.
Jay: Hmm well..... how about... no.......... what about..... no......... hmm, I'm totally at a loss here!
Galen: Hmm gimme a second.... wait for it.... wait for it... I think I got it, by JOVE I THINK I GOT IT!
Jay: Hit me GH! Hit me baby!
Galen: We run a 2 yard out to the sideline! No one will ever expect it especially since we are getting jammed at the line every play!!
Together: BRILLIANT!

Result: opponents 47 4th and 6

Together: Ain't that the bee's knees, almost had that one




Play: 2nd and 1, PSU 25

Galen: Well Jay, you know, this would be the perfect time to throw it deep. I mean, we can always run it on third you know.
Jay: Mahhhh well you know, we could just get in the I formation which no defense in the land thinks is a running formation and give it to BranDon.
Galen: You don't feel like, you know, like we'd be wasting a key opportunity to gain some major yards?
Jay: Hey, GH, baby, who loves you?
Halen: You do Jay, you do.
Jay: Yeah, lets give it to BranDon!

Result: Tackled in the backfield, 3rd and 6, repeat above scenario.

Play: 2nd and 5, 8th game of the season.

Jay: Hey Galen, remember that play that worked in 2002 when we put Michael Robinson in at RB and then handed him the ball?
Galen: Well, I was at a nursing home playing bridge with Glenn at the time, but I think I remember it.
Jay: You think, I mean, this may just be crazy talk but, what if... what if we put D. Williams back there?
Galen: JEHOSIPHAT! My mind is too cloudy with the slow, lonely decay of old age, but I think it does sound familiar. How bout we give it a go? We fake the jab and come straight for the jaw with the old haymaker!
Jay: Hold on, I have that page in the play book dog-eared (opens play book to find play marked with highlighter, sharpie, even a scratch and sniff sticker marked as run every 5 plays)... ahh here it is send it in
Galen: HA You'll RUE the day you went against us Defensive Coordinator X!

result: hit at the line by the saftey who know it was coming 3rd and 5.

Together: FIDDLESTICKS!



Psu's offense is pathetic, and I'm sick of it.

Tags: CHANGE TOPIC